Giving Up My Favorite Songs for Motherhood

Becoming a mother for the first time changes so many things… and while it didn’t necessarily change my song preference, I chose to give up my favorite songs for motherhood.

I still love many of the songs I gave up, but won’t listen to them… even when my children aren’t around to hear them.

About the Music

Unfortunately, my taste in music is rather… sad. Many of the songs I used to enjoy contain lyrics that are neither uplifting nor encouraging… in fact they tend to be downright depressing.

While I always saw that as an expression of my inward self, when my firstborn son (now I have two boys) came, it was time to give up my favorite songs for motherhood.

I have previously refrained from talking about this issue, but someone asked me, “do you want your son to sing this song?” And when the answer was a solid, resounding NO, I knew change had to happen. And since some of you might be in the same position, it’s time to break my silence on the topic.

Giving Up My Favorite Songs for Motherhood

Motherhood in no way requires you to give up your favorite tunes… but in my case, as a Christian, I could no longer justify what my children would hear if they grew up listening to the songs I enjoyed.

Some of the songs contained language (which I justified by not singing that word when singing the songs) but mostly the songs were sad or depressing. Many were related to mental illness topics, like self injuring behavior or even worse.

Even if I were not a Christian, though – the above question would have stopped me in my tracks. Giving up my favorite songs is a small price to pay to keep that content out of my children’s heads. Yes, they will likely hear it somewhere. But it doesn’t have to be from me.

Mental illness can take many forms and have many different symptoms… and intrusive thoughts happen more often than people realize. Movies and songs with lyrics that sneak into your head, (even when you aren’t listening to them) or comments people make… even your own thoughts that are impacted by the content you let in (see the impact of lyrics below). Click to learn about Managing Intrusive Thoughts as a Mama.

The Impact of Lyrics

It’s easy to say that a song is “just for fun” or “expressing yourself” without really thinking of the implications. But have you noticed that when a happy, upbeat song comes on your entire mood and even your demeanor often changes?

It can transform your entire day.

As I have been diagnosed by multiple psychiatrists as being mentally ill, and illnesses can run in families, I don’t want to be the one contributing to my children’s health being slowly impacted and potentially destroyed over time.

That isn’t to say that music alone holds that power… but whatever you let into your head will transform you over time. Whether that’s worries, destructive thinking, or even self-depreciation.

The opposite is also true… so giving up my favorite songs for motherhood (and replacing them with more uplifting, positive tunes) was and is a small (if not bittersweet) price to pay to help care for the mental health of my children.

Have you chosen to give anything up for the sake of the mental health of your children? Let me know in the comments below!